8.23.2009

Manama Nights! - 2

It has become a habit for one of my neighbors to come ringing my door bell at a very late hour, or checking if the door is well closed or not. Of course, I never managed to know who is this concerned neighbor as I don't find anyone by the time I reach the door. After panicking for the first three nights, it became a habit for me to wait for this childish maybe more like a Hollywood thriller scene. Nothing has yet happened tonight, but I preferred not to sleep now better than being awaken in an hour.

I'm not looking to know who it is anyway, I'll be moving by the end of this month. Days in Bahrain seem to pass so slowly most of the time, a dead country aspiring to have its mark among the Gulf. There are lots of things to do in Bahrain: Beach, mall, and eating. I have to admit that they do have several good dining places, but it's a bit out of budget to have a daily meal in a good restaurant here. The real heaven for me in the hot summer of Bahrain, also known as the lost paradise (yeah, I think they did loose paradise somewhere along the way), is the day I spend on the beach when I offer myself a real massage by an Asian lady. Her feet sometimes seem to bother me as a lay down my head to the floor, but then I close my eyes and just enjoy one hour of tension release. I then take a shower, enjoy looking at my tan in the mirror, and then I leave the resort, to go back to the streets of Manama, for another month of tension acquiring. My life in Manama is as simple as respiration: I inhale tension, I exhale it.

Of course I have my bad moments of AC/NO AC. I never really liked the AC, I always get a problem in my ear, or a problem in my back, or my sinus, and so on. It never ends the list of times I went to a doctor recommending me to avoid AC for several reasons. Regardless of the fact that outside home I have no control over AC where I work, neither where I shop, nor where I eat, I never could imagine how life can be in Bahrain with no AC.

When I reach home after a long walk or a short walk, the first thing I need is the AC. Which reminds me of my walking issue in Manama. If you're not a poor Indian worker trying to save money by not using transportation, you are considered as a freak when you walk for more than a kilometer in Bahrain. I have to admit that sometimes I like to brag about my expeditions among my colleagues who would be like: "Whaou, are you serious? You walked all that way? You're crazy!!" Now that's a statement worth considering! Maybe I was crazy for coming here. But ever since I set my plans and I fixed the date of my departure, even if for now it seems a bit far, I started to really enjoy Manama. I think it's like when a patient in a mental institution knows that he'll be cleared in a week, he'd then start enjoying the insanity of his entourage. I'd call that real entertainment.

So my loyal neighbor just knocked with his hand, it's more personalized than ringing my door bell. I think he's taking our relationship to the next level: intimacy!! I just hope he won't be sniffing up the laundry I left on the rooftop.

Time for me to get some sleep..

8.15.2009

Manama Nights!

It's not that I lost the will to write.. I just lost the time.. Today, like so many days before, I suddenly (like so many times before) realized that time is passing by. That everything moves forward, even your own-self, what remains behind are the things you wanted to do, the things you've done wrong, and the things you wish to do again. This is what the past is, a reflection of what you want to do and what you need to do, and what you don't need to do again. And you're lucky when you get stroke, repetitively, with this bits of a second when you see your past flying in front of your eyes. It's just like seeing your future, or at least what you should do about it.
So as I had this slight moment of enlightenment I realized that I should come back here, right to where I belong, where I breathe. The place where nonsense makes sense. Maybe the world is also a better place for that. But here, my nonsense is meaningful, to me at least. And you don't need anything else than a cup of coffee, a good blanket (or maybe that remote to turn off the fucking AC - and yeah yeah yeah, pardon my french) and your pen (as it's more poetic than a keyboard). The world at the tip of your words, and the universe all open for you.
I might as well make a use of this time I have to spend in this city I don't like very much. It might be the right place and the right time to learn a bit more about freedom. You see, the best place to see light is when you're in the dark!

ما قبل الأخير

ما زلت تملك دموعي
تأمرها بالسقوط كما تشاء
مرة باللامبالاة و مرة بالعشوائية
و دائماً بدون حتى أن تلاحظ

لم تكن الأول و لن تكون الأخير
لكنّك دائماً هنا
دائما حيث لا يجب أن أتركك
و دائما تتركني حيث لا أريد

ما زلت محور كتاباتي
ما زلت محور أفكاري
و ما زلت تبكيني
لكنّك لن تكون الأخير